This is different...

I have now taken a total of seven rounds of chemo: four combination cocktails of adriamycin and cytoxan, and three taxols. The former ones were supposedly very nausea-inducing, while the latter are considered more stomach-friendly. And indeed, I needed powerful anti-nausea drugs for the first four rounds to reduce the nausea to a slight queasiness. During my three rounds of taxol so far, I did not take anti-nausea drugs, nor did I feel the need to. It just didn't seem to bother my stomach at all.

Oddly, tonight all of that changed -- and not in a good way. What follows may be TMI for some, so feel free to skip the rest of this post...

This afternoon, seemingly out of nowhere, I felt the need to throw up. So for the first time during chemo, I actually found myself hunched over that porcelain bowl, letting some of the food I ate go through my head again. The really strange thing was that I didn't really feel nauseous before, just a little heartburn.

Afterwards I felt fine. I even had dinner a little later. Just to be safe I took a pepcid to reduce the stomach acid. But tonight, a few hours after dinner, the same thing happened all over again -- except this time I cleared out my stomach contents more thoroughly than the first time. Out came not only dinner, but also the pepcid and the pain pill (but no refills for me tonight -- who knows how much I've absorbed already). But again, I don't really feel nauseous, nor did I sense this coming on for more than a few seconds. I have noticed, though, that I have been getting lots of chemopausal hotflashes today, way more than I normally experience. How bizarre is this? This is really different from my experiences in previous rounds of chemo -- and not in a good sort of way...

We had hoped to make it to our niece L's wedding today. This would have required a nine hour car trip, which would have been really hard on me given that I just took another round of taxol on Thursday. I am sad I didn't get to witness her wedding, share the joy, and spend time with the family. However, if I imagine going through my current strange episode hundreds of miles away from home, and far away from my doctors, I would be very, very worried right now. Worried that the trip somehow might have made me feel worse. Worried about where to go for medical help should my condition decline. Worried about way too many things.

At least I am at home as I experience these strange new developments. I took a reglan to help keep that stomach of mine at bay. I am within easy reach of my doctors, and the ER and hospital with which I am familiar and where they keep my medical records. And right now I am very grateful for that -- even as I hope that I will not require the services of any medical professional anytime soon. 

Will I at least be able to sleep and get some more rest? I'll let you know in the morning...